Haiyahh..

During my stay in Germany, I always live together with other person in a shared-apartment, and never live alone. So far I have no big problem with that. I never have a big urge to have my own apartment / my own space. Perhaps it's because I never think too much about how I'm living my life. Until suddenly it bothered me. I have these thought: is it the way I want to live my life? to always live in a shared-apartment? (where I never have to think about how to maintain my own apartment/house and the responsibility is not as big as when you're having your own house/apartment) Do I want to live alone? to have my own house/apartment? Why do I want to do that? Should I move out somewhere else? Should I move to bigger city? (so I could be in the middle of the crowd and have more happening life - though it doesn't guarantee anything)
I know at some point in life we have to move to the next phase of our life. And this is what I don't think too much so far, how the way I live could effect my life - my current and perhaps future life. Whether I better live in big city and not in a small city, whether I better live in a shared-apartment and not live alone somewhere, or whether I should stay here or go back to Jakarta.
It would be easier if you have a goal, something that drives you to stick on the way you live your life. It looks easier when you're married (and so you have no choice not to live alone :p), or when you're having family.. *Hmm.. somehow that life path looks easier to follow* Or at least when you know what you want to go after or to take care. Hmm... Life is always like this, isn't it? Unexpected, unpredictable. And I'm forced to really think about it now. Alone. Well, not only to think, but to decide. To make decision. Again, alone. Arrrggghh... I hate it. I really hate it. :((

btw, kalo pikiran lagi jahat bgt, rasanya pingin nyalahin orang lain. Ini bukan jalan hidup yg gue mau, tapi gara2 orang lain lah gue jd begini hehe.. *gampang bener ya*
wah jd ngalor ngidul..

terakhir, numpang sekalian.
Selamat ulang taun buat adekku!! :) Moga2 dilempengin jalannya (dilurusin maksudnya)..